As I sit here typing, MrPossible has gone to work, I can see babyJ sleeping and once she’s up my day has begun till they are all asleep… Let me give you a summary of my day; clean the house, give my daughter a bath, feed her, play with her, have a bath, prepare lunch as MrPossible comes home for lunch, give the baby lunch, put her to sleep (siesta), prepare dinner for her and MrPossible, give her a bath, do the laundry and give her dinner, then she eats one more time, I also have to make time for MrPossible, to listen and gist , feed babyJ again as I am trying to wean her, put her to sleep which is an endless process, pray with them and when they are asleep, I can finally have my day( phew!)
I do not go to the office and my work does not end by four, my work is continuous whenever I am needed and then you say I am just a housewife? no darling, i am not JUST a house wife, I am a nurse, a caregiver, a cook, a mother, a cleaner, a home manager, a confidant, a reliable friend, an adviser, and the list goes on and all these process are exhausting on its own but you do not see me act up, complain about frustration, quit my job, I keep going on , hoping that everybody’s day is better than their previous. It so annoying when people say, oh you are enjoying, you are just a housewife, Before I go on, most stay home mums don’t like to be called “housewives”, they feel it is derogatory… I remember when I was pregnant, a family friend came over and saw that my hubby was eating by 9pm and told me, “you know you are home all day, the least you can do is make sure his food is ready on time…”I would like to explain some things that happened to me during pregnancy, I was in a new city and pregnant, could not do anything for the first three months, my mum was sending cooked food from her city to mine,which was like six hours away, my sister too who was with me in Lagos, was at the other end of the town, also had a baby and could not come all the time, I don’t want to bore you with the throwing up but I can remember that particular day, my friend made the statement, I was calling my friends in Lagos to help me buy yam so I can have it with oil, as nothing could stay down, oh did I say the yam deal did not fall through? MrPossible offered to eat out but you know now, I was acting the great wife…I accepted her correction, felt bad and could not tell her till she became a “housewife” and started making her complaint, how it is so hard being a” housewife” and how high the expectation from everyone is when you are a stay home mum, that was when I reminded her of what she said to me and she apologised but could not even remember.
My point here is this, it is not easy being a stay home mum and running a home, the truth is once you are married, your responsibility is a lot, then when a child joins the mix, you will be amazed how you keep holding up, everyone is watching , societal pressure, I pray there is no problem in your home, everyone would have something to say and you will hear stuff like “she’s just a housewife o”, “what does she do that she couldn’t do this?”,’ ‘ha! I wonder what she does through out the day”.
Whenever you see a stay-at-home mum , don’t judge her, just give her the look of ‘hang in there, you are doing great’, you might as well just say it. Cheers to every stay-at-home mum, potential mums, working mum, wife… Share your experience… This was written a long time ago…
bride2mom