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| Photo: metro.co.uk |
I have been following up this story of Naomi Oni, who was doused with acid on her face by an unknown person masked in a hijab… I was so sad when I read the story, acid bath could be a life changing experience for anyone, I remember saying a quick prayer that the person should be caught and just somedays ago, It was found out to be her friend…huh?! What kind of friend will do that? How mean can you be? And to think they have been friends for a long time…As I continued on the story, I read they had a fight where the victim insulted her friends looks, that got the friend really hurt as she was insecure in herself and her looks( talk about pouring salt into an open wound)… After reading this , I learnt some life lessons that I would love to share with you…
Beware of toxic friendship:
When you are in a relationship that you guys quarrel a lot to the extent of exchanging angry, hurtful words, please leave that relationship because even when the fight is over and the “I am sorry’s” are said someone is still hurting ( Individuals process hurt differently) and may just want you to know how they feel or felt, it may not be through an acid bath, it could be through some other way you may never find out.
Be careful what you say to people when you are angry:
As it is often said, our words are like stones, when thrown, it can hardly be taken back.
Don’t push them over the edge:
Everybody ,everyday is going through one thing or the other. My sister always says, “Imagine everyone is at the verge of breaking down or have something wrong with them, don’t allow your words be the last thing that will push them over the edge” From what I read, Mary Konye was insecure in herself , her looks and also always wanted approval from her friend but instead of that, during a fight, she got an insult that made her feel worse about herself or confirmed her fears that she does not look as good as her friend and that sent her over the edge.
You may not be responsible of how people feel, act and behave but what you say to them is your responsibility. Please let us be careful.
One-sided relationship: If your relationship is one-sided, leave! Also if you have an upper hand in a relationship, please treat the individual well… One-sided relationship breeds hatred, jealousy and lots more.
I am not trying to insinuate anything on the victim being wrong, I think it is absolutely crazy for someone to go that length to hurt a friend no matter the problem but I am just sharing what I learnt today.
PS- I just had to post this today, maybe we might just start a surprise post now and then… See you guys on saturday.
My dearest Blogger, you have adviced well. I used to have a friend who was nothing but poison to me. Jealous of me to the point that she tried to ruin relationships I was trying to build with members of the opposite sex. I made up my mind to cut off from her completely (its been a year now) and I have had peace unending. Since I let her go, I havnt had to deal with negative energy or vibes. The lesson I learned is this: many people will come along your way, but not all are meant to stay, when its time for them to go, we shouldn’t try to make it work.
Yes you are right, not all are meant to stay…
Great blog babe! About the lady hmm God help us and help her heal quickly. Friendship, pray for God to bring great people your way, it works like magic! Please can you address this sensitive issue about how it is difficult to get married in churches these days. I have a lot of friends with sad and bitter tales. In the early days of the church, the pastor’s were glad when intending couples ask to be married in their churches instead of in Juju shrines. Today, the story is different, I hear about some outrageous demands/requests that is been made so much so that some couples have resorted to inviting a minister to get them married in reception halls and tents. Like I said this issue is sensitive but it needs to be discussed. Maybe people can talk about their personal experiences. Thank you Obehi.
at Ayi model, I would love to look into it…Please if there is anyone with concrete details on their experience as to what Ayi model is talking about, send a mail to me on bride2mom@gmail.com. Thanks Ayi model
Lol @ Ayi model..funny u shd say dis am experiencing d same thing at d chrch my fiance and i hav chosen to get married…i hav fancied d idea of scrapping d whole chrch wedding thing and just opt fr a registry wedding instead cos d marriage class in d church nor be here at all. it happens immediately afta church (which closes by 11am) and if u havnt d sense to run to d marriage seminar place on time by the time you stroll in there u have like up to five couples waiting before you and we are attended to one at a time…Jeez and some couples spend at least 30mins in there i wonder wot they are counselling.. D chrch is on airport road…no more details lol btw nice work Obee..not able to view your posts immediately when u BC them becos for some reason my device opens a blank page whenever i click on d link..doing this from a system.
True..
Got plenty toxic friends I had to do with in recent times, friends that even monitor your progress & once they realize you are above their level, envy sets in. This is sure a lovely piece & should be an eye opener to us all. Thanks dear, keep it up.
Am glad it is an eye opener…Thanks
True talk. On the flip side of this is forgiveness, I think. Sometimes people say things to hurt us but revenge should never be an option. When we don’t forgive, the other person owns us because we are obsessed with brooding over what they did to us and how we will repay them. If only the angered friend had forgiven and moved on, none of this would’ve happened. I learned from this and I hope others did too. Timely post, by the way. Thank you. E
Yeah you are right. Thanks for drawing our attention to forgiveness…Let us all learn to forgive and we will live happier lives.
Wow! It’s amazing how far some people would go. Iv certainly learnt a valuable lesson today. It goes beyond having toxic or jealous friends, it’s that some people really take words said to them in anger or otherwise really personal. I mean forget the friendship, what would she have said to her that would have hurt so bad to make her do such a thing. Just..WOW
Some of u shldnt confuse envy with anger or rage. Envy is a thin of the mind, of peerception. What one percieves as envy is healthy critisism to another.
Really?? Seriously, are you for real?? Healthy criticism my xxxx!