I would not lie that the numbers had nothing to do with it, I would not lie that the lack of engagement had nothing to do with it too and did you know “what would people say” was also holding me back, let us face it, the social media space has become more unfriendly than when I started in 2014, I have tried to build over and over again this blog that I love so much but I need you to know that I have been lazy, tired, scared, disappointed and just not motivated to write based on fear and the numbers. Fear of people getting the wrong message, fear of continuation, fear of not showing up and fear of  generally what people would think I am all about but I am doing it afraid going forward. There would be people out there who says, just write and  you would build your audience as you grow, don’t worry about the numbers, just grow a tough skin and don’t care what people say. What they have not told you is how hard it is to look at your once large audience drop to an audience of one, they did not tell you how it would make you feel when you write a seemingly amazing post and only your good friends drop a comment or how a word from a friend, or even family not necessarily made to harm you can make you feel like dropping it all and just fitting into societal norm but are we going to based our lives on how we feel?  Are we going to show up only when people show up? Are we going to sulk around the corner thinking of ”what would people say”, because we decided to base our relevance on the crowd or are we just going to let go of our purpose all together? Does the crowd showing up or not make you less of a singer, a writer, a great mother or whatever you are? Does the affirmation of people make you a more successful person,  David wouldn’t have killed Goliath if he did not kill the lion in the bush where nobody saw him, neither would he had even faced the giant, if he did not have the confidence when his brothers looked down on him on the battlefield or when Goliath mocked him publicly, Keep building for yourself, the audience of one , perfecting your craft consistently and watch yourself slay giants. Today, I choose to tell more stories, to engage more with you, to have more fun , even when it is an audience of one, I choose to live in purpose, I choose to do the work and above all, I choose to show up! Where would you like to show up in your life today?
bride2mom