Remember how we all thought our parents or the older folks do not understand anything we are going through and we say stuff like ‘they don’t get it’ According to my mum. “All these things you are doing now, we did it tooThis write-up is from a marriage counsellor and married man with 35 years experience in marriage…I know we can learn something from this so I decided to share…It is a speech on a wedding…Enjoy! I would be commenting in italics on my learnings



The words from the old are words of wisdom…


For us the old school, we never had this kind of splendour triumphant and glamorous entry into marriage. All our children deserve this… (They kept is simple then, is that why most of their marriages are rock-solid?) So we congratulate the newly weds and we thank God for His provision.

SERMONS have been preached and several speeches made in the course of the long walk, starting from last year to this day’s event. So, mine is just going to be a short gist, then we go into gyration and merriment…


LADIES and gentlemen, please permit me to say that the groom is the luckiest man on earth to have the bride as a wife and he knows it.The Bride is a fully Packaged lady


A friend just got married some weeks ago and a mutual friend called me telling me how the girl is lucky…I had to point out over and over again that the boy is the lucky one, because I believe the girl is doing him a favour…I can remember before I got married to my hubby people always told me and him how lucky I was and before I could even say anything, he would say “no I am lucky she chose me” …I think that is how it should be but I know the couple are both lucky to have found each other.

For the Groom, I will speak one old OYIBO my teacher taught me in those days: birds of identical plumage congregate to the nearest proximity…meaning that what attracted the bride and groom is what they have in common, therefore culminating to the marriage of today…


If you don’t have things in common then there is a cause for alarm

MARRIAGE is a serious business, a lifetime project… .not for Baby-Men. That is why the bible speaking says, for this reason a MAN shall leave his parents and cleave to his wife…(did you hear?your wife/hubby is your best friend not your mother/father)
There is the saying that the Adult should work with the seriousness of a Child at play. Children don’t think of their play as recreation. It’s their job. It’s their life. They are exploring. They are in that sandbox or the bouncing castle because its important to them. They are completely caught up in it.That is what marriage should be. Treat your marriage with seriousness even more than you treat anything that means a lot to you…Job , business e.t.c)
Michealangelo, a stone sculpture designer said of himself: ‘I did not really shape the stone into anything, I merely chipped away at it until I uncovered the form that was already there’…..So marriage is designed by God to be successful, just play your part to uncover the beauty that is already there….

Marriage Institution
Please note that no man has the master key to run a successful marriage, except God. He is the institutor of marriage. So consult him through the manual of life, the bible and other good Christian marriage literatures for any challenges. (God has to be involved! Have you noticed that some ladies /couple hold on to God more after marriage?) HOWEVER, let me quickly talk about communication in a HOME. Home is where family live and a house is where they stay. Inshort to me, communication is the bedrock to any successful marriage…would talk about this soon



COMMUNICATION
There must be effective communication in the home, to overcome the desire to conceal feelings and thoughts and rise to the level of talking about the issues of life…such as, money, fear, wishes, motivations, sexual feelings and responses( I highlighted sexual feelings for a reason…coming soon) mistakes made, resentments, misunderstanding etc with the intent to resolve them (intent to resolve them! not to know who is right or wrong, not to point out inadequacies TO RESOLVE!)

FOOD
It is a vital tool to making a successful home: the shortest journey to a man’s heart is through the mouth…..good neatly presented food…did I hear somebody say Pounded Yam and Ogbolo? Make him salivate, make his Adam’s apple move… And your darling husband, midway in the food would say, ask anything even up to 90% of my empire. After-all, Queen Esther did it in the bible and saved the nation of Israel.

I hear people say nowadays that my hubby doesn’t really bother about food, he knows I dont like cooking and he understands, he can get by on noodles…Give him a good meal and see his response(praises you have never heard before).I think he may not be passionate about food but every man loves a good meal…you better start cooking before he prefers to eat out.

FINALLY, make your HOME a home indeed. And of course, it takes a collective efforts. Bride , make the groom always glad to come home, and Groom always make the bride feel sorry when you are leaving the home. Gbam! well said

I think this is the best chairman’s speech yet…brief and educative
Let us discuss… Do you agree with everything? Is there something missing?…Is food very important to men?
bride2mom