Sex is beautiful and it is fun and as you go on in it, you enjoy it more and more(hmmmm…don’t ask me how I know o). I can write a lot on how amazing sex is and yet it will not capture it well enough as I would want it to…. In-as-much-as sex is beautiful and it is the most amazing way of expressing your love when words fail you, you know when it is sweeter and more fulfilling? It is when you are married. You might think “oh she’s going all gospel on us today” and to that,this is my question to you. Be sincere with yourself. How many of you have felt fulfilled and at peace after having sex with your boyfriends? Okay maybe few but it is always short-lived. Let me just highlight what premarital sex can do to your relationship: It creates suspicion and kills trust: I have seen so many relationships that start out good then they start fighting after sex and you will hear the guy saying stuff like, “I don’t trust her around that guy.” Most times, it is because he is scared that she is giving it to another person as she has given him…In-fact, I know one where the guy beat up the lady because he was suspecting her and she was not guilty. It creates fear: Especially for the ladies, most times they get scared and say, “what if I am pregnant?” God forbids they miss their period by one day then you will hear all the promises they would make to God… “God its me your daughter, Obehi, I have come to say I know I strayed but if you give me back this period, I promise you that I will totally give you my life, no boyfriend till after university.” Hehehe how many of those promises are kept though? It brings about guilt: I think at least when you start having sex before marriage, there is a guilty feeling for some time and incase you have an over conscious conscience then the guilt can go on till you stop doing it, just know there are some pros that do not care about it. Their eye don strong for the matter and guilt even fears them. but if you really listen, deep down inside you, there is the guilty feeling still there especially when you know betterYou feel insecure: It is this insecurity that kills trust and brings about suspicion. All of a sudden whenever you see him on the phone with someone else, your heart skips a bit and you fear that he might be cheating, you start almost counting your losses and he is also suspicious of any guy around you. You Feel used: If relationship starts losing its spark, the lady start fighting to make it work because she knows what she has invested in the relationship and yes sex means different things to a guy and lady. She doesn’t want to feel used at all, since she has given some to this guy, let her try to make it work. The picture in my head is a crumbling house and as the house crumbles she tries to build it piece by piece yet it keeps crumbling…why not wait to give that strength and vigour to your home?You Hurt more: Chai! When you see someone that has left a sexual relationship, especially one that finally gave it to the guy after a long time…chai ! it can be painful. The hurt and pain they feel is so sad and you will pity them because there is a lot of regret to go with the hurt. You know how even in a non-sexual relationship sometimes after the breakup, you start asking yourself, where did I go wrong, what if and what if? In a sexual relationship there are the what if’s as well but this time worse…I remember a friend caught her boyfriend kissing another girl in a party where he knew she was oh, inshort it was his party. He invited her and the other girl and she came crying to me, I was quick to tell her, the guy was not good enough(my big mouth) and she said, “you don’t know what I have given up for this guy, I gave him my virginity.” she cried some more and they finally settled and I ran for cover…lol It gives you déjà vu’s in marriage: I have this amazing friend that would say “if I had known, I wouldn’t have allowed boys smooch me sef, because no matter how in love you are with your hubby, a thought or two will filter into your mind sometimes,” talk more of sex, may it not filter into your mind at the wrong time. Sexually transmitted diseases:Do I really need to explain this? Marital SexIt is guilt free: No matter how much you do it, whatever style you do it, wherever you do it, there is no guilt involved whatsoever It is amazing when you are in love and you know your hubby is in love too: Sex is amazing when you are in love, omg!!!! there is just this peace, confidence, and commitment that reflects in your sexual life There may be pregnancy scare but if a baby come, it would be welcome with excitement and celebration You are not trying to hold him down with your sexual prowess, you don’t have to google sex or work soooo hard, you guys can discover your bodies in ways you never thought of, inshort inspiration hits you once you get it started/ If you are in a committed, loving, God fearing marriage you don’t fear cheatingThere is no shame: After all is done, you can gist about it, share your highs, share your lows, share everything and even fantasize of the type you want to try out another time and don’t feel guilty, you don’t think back on a move you made and feel ashamed or dirty, you might be shy, you may even tease yourselves about some kind of moves you guys made but it would just be fun. You can even pray afterwards: Guess what!!!!! You can pray afterwards and it is would most likely be a prayer of thanksgiving not forgiveness…lol This is just my opinion, what do you think?
